Author: Pastor Steve Duffy
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 includes these real life parallels that we all face, with each including some element of loss. Consider these examples from Ecc 3:1-2a,4...
For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
a time to be born, and a time to die;
...
a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
This past week we talked about the topic of relationship loss in our "Challenges Teens Face". I'm grateful to the Lord as He moved students to be honest about what specific examples of loss they are currently facing in life so that this topic arose. Those specific examples included: changing friends or friend groups either purposefully (e.g., bad influences) or occurring naturally (e.g., moving, changing schools), siblings moving out (e.g., heading to college), and death of a loved one.
In our teaching time we focused on the relationship between David and Jonathan. This included moving from the formation of their deep relationship (1 Sam 18:1-5), to the relational loss when David fled (1 Sam 20:41-42), and finally to David's response to Jonathan's death in 2 Sam 1. This example, along with the pattern of David's lament Psalms in response to many of the situations he faced in the context of 1-2 Samuel, provide a framework to answer the question "how do I handle loss?" for students.
I'm grateful to our student ministry leaders for creating a caring place to share in their group times. In the sharing, and in some cases lamenting in that moment, the time was guided by the Scriptures we spoke of that night as well as prayer together. All of these are God's provision to us in the midst of loss. We mourn, we remember (the Lord, the significance of the relational loss), we process together, we trust the Lord to lead us through each moment and give hope through His presence and His word, and we move forward together in thanksgiving.
Although loss in the various forms is not part of the original creation (Gen 1-2), it is the reality we live in until the new creation (Rev 21-22), and the Lord does not leave us to ourselves in this life! In all loss, we find our greatest hope in what will ultimately be our future reality….
And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. 4 He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away. - Rev 21:3-4
How do you handle relational loss? Consider the previous, and even engage the young people in your life in a conversation on this topic since it is a shared human experience. Use this as an opportunity to discuss the things previously mentioned and point them to Jesus who calls His people friends forever and is coming again!
“This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. 14 You are my friends if you do what I command you. 15 No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you.” - John 15:12-15
He who testifies to these things says, “Surely I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus! - Rev 22:20
Photo Credit: Vegan Oazïs, Unsplash
